Thursday, December 28, 2006

Man Charged With Assault for Farting on Cellmate

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Just about to return to work for a couple of days or so prior to my second looooong weekend in a row.

Had a blast this Christmas. Hope y'all had a merry one as well!

So I'll do a quick, if not all that serious, post, to reward the few who drop by to see if I'm back yet.

Here it is...

They call him "Jack the Ripper".

...charged with assault on a confined person for allegedly passing gas repeatedly, resulting in a fight at the Lincoln County Jail.

Guards were first alerted to the problem Dec. 14 when inmate Jesse Dorris began banging on his cell door, screaming he wanted out of his cell, according to the North Platte Bulletin.



(...)

Dorris was finally moved to a different cell out of nose-shot of Bruggeman, but that afternoon while inmates were lining up for dinner, Bruggeman reportedly got next to Dorris, backed up to him and broke wind once again.


Well, read the whole stinking thing. There's some good punnery about the whole thing at the link, too.

This is just too surrealistically hilarious!

He's in for only three months for violating his probation, but now faces up to five more years for assault and/or a ten grand fine...

There you have it... watch out... if you fart in the presence of others within an enclosed space, like a jail cell or, say, an elevator, you could actually go to jail for it!